Sam gets his pie and eats it – a sexual story of hardware

Written by beesty, male, 34

Photo of beesty

Preface

This screenplay follows Samuel S. Hung and his antics with Raspberry Pie. Keep your chips cool and make sure your fans working properly…

Sam S. Hung: Well hello there sexy... you’ve got the best bits and pieces I’ve ever seen.
Raspberry Pie: Thanks hun. Wanna see my 64 bit hardware?
Sam S. Hung: Oh yeah baby, I’m getting a hard drive... Can I see one of your main connectors?
Raspberry Pie: Ok hun, get ready....
Sam S. Hung: OMG... You are one horny motherboard... Don’t you even have a case?
Raspberry Pie: I’m too hot for that. Hehe. Hey and I don’t use any anti virus, makes it more fun that way. I want your data inside me right now…
Sam S. Hung: You serious?
Raspberry Pie: Yeah. I’m feeling hot and overclocked. I need someone to format my drive baby... Grab your stick and imagine your plugging it into my socket...
Raspberry Pie: Now imagine it doesn’t quite fit so you gotta shake it around a bit..
Sam S. Hung: Oh byte yeah....
Raspberry Pie: And then all of a sudden it slips inside... Now watch my light flick on and off as you give me everything you’ve got
Sam S. Hung: Oh my god baby... I think I’m gonna de-fragment.
Raspberry Pie: Not yet, keep it going hun... I know, let’s get your Wi-Fi involved...
Sam S. Hung: Really?
Raspberry Pie: Ah-ha, I like it when the Wi-Fi scans me. Makes it really dirty… go on turn it on.... find my signal baby and hook up with me...
Sam S. Hung: OMG you’re a completely open connection...
Raspberry Pie: Yeah... I never use protection... Makes it more exciting... Your USB stick looks really full....
Sam S. Hung: Holy crap, Is that your fan I can see?
Raspberry Pie: Yeah... do you like big fans? Mine can blow anything near it right away
Sam S. Hung: I can’t hold out much longer... I’m gonna de-fragment any second now.
Raspberry Pie: De-fragment all those bits baby... feel that fan blowing air out of my tiny narrow slots...
Sam S. Hung: Omg.. omg... om... BLUE SCREEN

Created: 2014-05-30 09:31:15

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