Blonde jokes and terminology

Written by beesty, male, 34

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Some blonde jokes from the past that I dug up. Not my own work, but they always make me chuckle so I had to share them. No offense to the blondes out there. I'm sure you're all lovely really.

Blonde jokes

Q: Why are blondes so easy to get into bed?
A: Who cares?

Q: How is a blonde like peanut-butter?
A: They spread for the bread.

Q: What do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125?
A: a foursome.

Q: What do you give the blonde that has everything?
A: Penicillin.

Q: What do you call a blond mother-in-law?
A: An air bag.

Q: Why do blondes get confused in the ladies room?
A: They have to pull their own pants down.

Q: Why do blondes wear panties?
A: To keep their ankles warm.

Q: Why should you never take a blonde out for coffee?
A: It's too hard to re-train them.

Q: What do blondes do for foreplay?
A: Remove their underwear.

Q: What's the mating call of the blonde?
A: "I'm *sooo* drunk!"

Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the frozen orange juice can for 2 hours?
A: Because it said 'concentrate'.

Blonde terminology

Anally - occurring yearly
Artery - study of paintings
Bacteria - back door of cafeteria
Caesarian section - district in Rome
Cat scan - searching for kitty
Cauterize - made eye contact with her
Colic - sheepdog
Coma - a punctuation mark
Congenital - friendly
Dilate - to live long
Enema - not a friend
Fester - quicker
Fibula - a small lie
Impotent - distinguished, well known
Intense pain - torture in a teepee
Labour pain - getting hurt at work
Medical staff - doctor's cane
Morbid - higher offer
Nitrate - cheaper than day rate
Outpatient - person who has fainted
Pathology - a rambler's association
Post operative - letter carrier
Protein - favoring young people
Radiologist - Dr Fox on Capital FM
Rectum - damn near killed 'em
Recovery room - place to do upholstery
Secretion - hiding anything
Serology - study of knighthood
Terminal illness - sickness at airport
Tumour - an extra pair
Urine - opposite of you're out
Varicose - located nearby

Created: 2014-05-30 10:00:48

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