Meeting your online contact in real life...

Meeting your online dating contact face to face

Arranging to meet a member face to face through an online dating service like Flirthut is the biggest step between stranger and partner. If you've been chatting to someone online for a while, it's probably time to push the boat out a little and arrange to meet them. And if you have got far enough to arrange a date with a member already, congratulations to you. If you're a guy, most women will expect you to ask them out. If you're a woman, bear in mind some guys may be a little shy if they are taking longer than you expect to ask you out. So why not do it instead? Sending messages backwards and forwards is fine, but it can get boring and most people's expectations are to meet someone eventually.

Couple dining out

Meeting a stranger face to face is nerve racking, even for the most confident person. Always arrange to meet somewhere neutral for both of you. Somewhere where there are other people and you and your date can travel to easily. It will make them feel safe and less cautious, making the date go smoother for all. The classic meeting places are bars, clubs, restaurants and even popular parks during the day. Don't arrange to meet anyone at their place of residence or invite them to yours.

Looking good on your first date

An important thing to remember on a first date is to look good. That doesn't mean you have to be the best looking man or woman. Take the time to sort your hair out and pamper yourself. If you're a guy, have a shave, make sure you don't have spinach in your teeth, and put on some decent clothes that you feel comfortable in. If you're a woman, don't go over the top with the make-up. Keep it light and simple. Show off your natural beauty. Dress in something that looks smart, even if it's casual and avoid the minimalist look. Something clean and fresh looking - preferably something that is fairly fashionably. Try not to look like something the cat just dragged in (unless the person you're meeting likes the dragged through a hedge backwards look! - And if that's the case, please let us know. It'd make an interesting story here!)

Smell nice for your date

Smell fresh and clean - have a wash. This applies mainly to the guys out there. I'm pretty certain, but not many people are into meeting stinky dates. Smelling good isn't just about bathing yourself in perfumes and cologne but rather having a shower and brushing your teeth. If you're a guy, get one of your female friends' opinion with regards to deodorants and colognes if you're unsure. If you're a women, get one of your male friends to tell you if that perfume you're wearing is sexy or if it smells like a toilet freshener (you know that smell...). Smells are very important on the dating scene and can stimulate all sorts of chemistry between two people.

Keep your posture looking confident

Don't slouch when you meet your date and walk confidently to greet them. Always smile and look straight at them when you meet for the first time. Some dates like the "kiss on the cheek" greeting and some prefer a handshake or nothing at all. Handshakes are generally regarded as "cold" and too formal so if your date doesn't give you any signals to greet them with a "kiss on the cheek", just don't do anything physical to start with. Greet them with a warm, friendly "hello". The physical stuff will come later. The worst thing to do is to appear desperate or overconfident. It will put your date off even before you've started so if you're unsure, back off from anything physical until you get to know them better.

Look interested in your date

Make and maintain eye contact throughout the date. There's a huge difference between talking to someone online and actually meeting them in person. When you meet someone face to face, the eyes will give away a lot about you. Eyes that look down and hardly ever at the person you're talking to suggest you lack confidence. Make sure you look directly at your date, but don't stare! Listen to them when they speak and let them finish what they have to say before you talk. Tell them about yourself but keep it brief and summarise your key attributes - and yes you have lots of them, everyone does. People you've just met don't always want to hear your life story or how painful your childhood was. Ask questions but questions you really want to know. Your date will want to tell you about themselves and vice versa.

If you're a man, be a gentleman. Any guy can do this and it lets your date know that you're considerate and willing to make an effort. You can be as gangster or tough as you like but when you hold a door open for your date or pull out a chair and let them sit down before you do, it will make them take more notice of you.

If you're a woman, show the guy you are confident and assertive but let his natural instinct take over by letting him gently lead. If you're a very confident woman, try not to show off your confidence just yet as you may appear to be over confident, which can put a lot of guys off.

Keep your emotions under control

If you meet someone for the first time and instantly know they are the person of your dreams, keep it to yourself. Don't tell your date that. Most people have several defensive barriers up initially and they are unfortunately looking for things that are negative about you, so don't give them any to think about. It's human nature - people play cautiously with strangers. And just remember, that's exactly what you both are to each other - strangers. Keep any feelings you think you may have about the other person in your head and don't let them out until you really hit it off.

Couple in love on a bicycle

Tell us your dating story

And if you hit it off after meeting on Flirthut, please share your story with us. We would really love to hear from you to give our members around the world some inspiration.

More dating tips of interest

Check out some of our other pages with useful information on dating tips. Online dating should be a pleasant experience for anyone and if you've got anything else you think we should include here, why not get in touch with us and let us know.

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